Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Let's Be Unreasonable, Shall We?

UFOs are everywhere. People from all walks of life, from every region on Earth, have witnessed them. To deny their existence is to deny the Sun, the air, and the very ground we walk on. Few actually doubt that there are unexplained phenomena in our skies. Meteor showers were a mystery to us for ages. And how long have people looked up in awe at the Northern Lights, convinced of some hidden meaning?

Yes, I believe in the existence UFOs. I believe there are indeed Unidentified Flying Objects out there. But unlike many, I believe these UFOs are either aircraft of some kind, natural atmospheric occurrences, or hoaxes. Everyone who knows me - or has read this weblog for a time - already knows I'm a skeptic by nature, so I won't dwell on the boring reasoning that influences my own way of thinking. Rather, let's just go for a Fun Ride!

Have you, or anyone you know, ever been abducted by space aliens? Well, if you think so, then you are not alone! Here's a handy-dandy website to meet up with fellow abductees:

If you need wellness treatment after your ordeal, you can try out the various alternative medicine outlets available online today. There's also the crystal healing option for the metaphysically inclined. And I would be remiss if I didn't provide a link to that all-powerful healer, the magnet. (I would be even more remiss if I didn't include this link as well.)

Paranormal research is serious business to many folks out there. Hundreds - if not thousands - of people have dedicated their lives to writing books and hosting conventions for other folks who have nothing better to do with their money. The International Society for Paranormal Research is there for any willing takers. They offer investigations, clairvoyance classes and testing, and ghost hunting expeditions. (I took particular note of the clairvoyance testing at $1450!) ADVISORY NOTE: This website seems to be dated (circa 2004), so no promise as to the group's current state of affairs.

Doing some browsing for ghost hunting equipment, I came across this page, which features various instruments for measuring such ghostly phenomena as movement, temperature changes, and electro-magnetic field fluctuations. (Oh my!) Why can't they just sell a camcorder that focuses correctly and doesn't shake when you use it?

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[ INTERMISSION: As a big Scooby-Doo fan, I offer this link that has the lyrics to the Scoob theme song. (And yes, I've known the lyrics myself for years.) ]

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I looked up gremlin websites, but came across this PBS webpage instead: Gremlins: Faces in the Forest. I know, they're just monkeys. But some of them do look like little gremlins.

There was a time, I suppose, when a vampire was a vampire (except for Dracula). But nowadays, we can run into all sorts of vampire types, including Living, Blood, and Psychic versions. By the way, have you ever noticed how female vampires are almost always incredibly sexy to behold? Really, if it wasn't for the death thing, what guy wouldn't want to have sex with a vampiress? (Yes, I know: gay guys. But for them, there are these vampires.)

While we're on the subject, hack movies about dead people and demons (Jason, Freddy Krueger, etc.) are NOT the same as chomp movies like Jaws and Anaconda. People, after all, do get eaten by animals. And you can avoid killer animals by avoiding where they live. But how does one avoid a homicidal ghoul? (For the record, it should be noted that as of this date, not one confirmed kill has been recorded at the hands of a ghost or demonic possession. Of course, that may very well be because spirits tend to hide their tracks so well!)

People have been believing in the supernatural since human eyes first witnessed a sunrise. Let's face it: biological living is B-O-R-I-N-G. Where are all the fairies? (insert obvious joke.) Where are all the unicorns and elves? And if I do lose a loved-one to death, why can't I speak with him again? I want to!

Birth, sex, work, and death. I quit smoking for that?

Somebody buy me a beer.

Finally, for those of you who insist on being reasonable, I give you a few links to websites of the scientific nature: Live Science; Discover Magazine;; The American Medical Association (sorry, no voo-doo cures there); and for you die-hard skeptics out there (like me),

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